Thankful Thursday: the one where I met the man I would one day marry

Happy T H A N K F U L   T H U R S A D A Y  folks

i'm so excited it's thursday

for one it means that tomorrow is friday

(insert praising hand emoji's here)

(2) my love comes home from Albania one week from today
and (3) i'm beyond excited for this post

bear with me as i am a bit sentimental at the moment
i think i get that from my dad
(hi dad)

i love looking back on seasons in my life
the good ones and the not so good ones
i love seeing how God's faithfulness
in all circumstances
has never failed
and most of the time that always comes as a surprise to me
i love looking back at times in my life where
my hopes, dreams and hearts desires
were nothing in comparison to what the Lord had in store for me

things like ending up at Cal Poly SLO
(even though i had no desire to go there)
but then i met the most incredible people
then there were trips that i went on overseas that i was terrified to go on
but they led me deeper into a reliance on the Lord
and brought me into relationship with incredible friends
and those relationships have opened up the door for opportunities that would have never
come otherwise
(like meeting more people and traveling to Utah to do wedding flowers)
in all of these situations
Gods plans were so much bigger
soooooooo much
God is always working
He is always up to something
always orchestrating
whether we see it or not

today i am so thankful
that god's plans for my life
are so much greater than the plans that i could ever have for myself

it was 4 years ago
that God began paving the way for something
so great
and so wonderful
gosh and i had no idea what was to come

sunday
J U N E  2 3,  2 0 1 3
this was the day that i met the man i would one day marry
this incredible man

and i had no clue
no freaking clue

i never would have thought in a million years it would have been him
was i interested?
nope
did i want to get to know this man more?
nah
was he at all on my radar?
not even the slightest

honestly i can't remember the point at which i first met him
i don't remember our introduction
but i do remember the day

my roommate margo and i had friends staying with us for a couple days
and so after church that sunday
we found ourselves at lunch with some guys from the young adult group

(who are the photo bombers)

we ate lunch at the iron press
then walked around the OC Mix Mart
and stumbled into a cute store that had so many garden knick nacks
and succulents
and FERNSSSS
and suddenly one of the guys we were with was in a picture with me

clearly we can see that he loved me then

i mean what other guy would take a picture with me and a fern??

i don't remember having a conversation with him that day

i don't remember even saying goodbye

but i do remember my roommate margo

taking this photograph of me with my favorite type of fern

and this guy named Robert who jumped on in

(and now that i know him 

him jumping into this picture makes total sense)

it's clear to me now that i was in no way at a place in my life

where there was capacity or space for robert when we met

i had plans and desires and dreams of how my life was going to look

and nothing was going to get in the way of that

but the Lord was already orchestrating

and He was so gracious and gave me a little glimpse into what was to come

even though i was completely oblivious

over the course of the next two years i would see robert a few times

mostly at social gatherings hosted by our mutual friends

he was around

but we weren't friends

we were acquaintances

 nothing beyond a "hey" or a "hi" when we saw each other

the only amount of friendship we had was a Facebook "friendship"

and it wasn't really until the beginning/middle of 2015

my heart started to shift

and that's a story for another time

(blog post to follow)

 i can't believe i'm sitting here writing this post

i can't believe the journey that the Lord has had me and robert on

separately

(and now together)

over the past 4 years

i can't believe that i am thankful for that random day in 2013

i can't believe that i fell in love with

and am marrying that man who jumped in that picture with me

i can't believe how incredible that man in the picture is

(cause i didn't know for a long time)

i can't believe how much God has used robert to 

change my life

to challenge me

to grow me

to show me how much my Savior loves me

 4 years ago

I  H A D   N O   I D E A

im so thankful

so so so thankful that i had no idea then

and i'm so thankful now that i can look back and see the Lord's hand in everything

im so so so thankful that Gods plan has/continues to be beyond what i could have ever

dreamt of for myself

i'm so thankful for all the big 

(and little)

things in my past that the Lord has used to bring me to where i am today

i wouldn't trade them for anything

what are you thankful for today???

Thankful Thursday: the one where gratitude changes everything.

It's been a while.
Almost three whole years.
I'm not sure how, when, or why I walked away from the blogging world
but I guess I'm back
for a little bit at least.
It honestly feels awkward sitting here at my computer typing this
I feel like I've never done this before.
I feel out of place.
Power through Rae, power through!

Ok so I have this framed print out that I found online
(for free obvi)
during the Thanksgiving season a few years back.
I printed it not because it was a free thanksgiving printable
(cause lets be real who doesn't love a freebee printable)
but because I love what it says.

G R A T I T U D E   C H A N G E S   E V E R Y T H I N G

and I really believe that it does.

Over the past couple months I have gone back and forth

between wanting and not wanting to

revisit this blog

But every time I go to the bathroom

(tmi??)

or take a shower

or brush my teeth 

I see this phrase staring back at me

and today I finally made a decision

(and ironically it is Thursday)

I am going to *attempt* to bring back

Thankful Thursdays.

I'm not sure what this will look like.

I'm not sure if it will look like it used to.

I'm not sure if I'll do it every week.

But right now I am doing it.

In my current season of life

(the busy season...which i feel like every season of life is)

 I don't want any of the Lords provisions to go unnoticed.

I don't want to loose my gratitude for his provisions because I am

"too busy"

that's unacceptable

So this blog is to keep me accountable

 to keep me grateful for all the provisions God has so graciously given and continues to give. 

(I deserve N O N E of them btw)

The little things.

The big things.

And everything in between.

So with all that being said

 today I am thankful for...

dinner dates

conversations with my mom

celebrating my sweet dad

quick trips to San Diego

celebrating friends and their accomplishments 

(yay lindsay)

car rides down the coast

summer nights

weekend trips to Salt Lake City

airplanes

(even if I hate them, they are still pretty incredible)

being surrounded by mountains

catching up with friends I haven't seen in a while

meeting precious babies

coffee, coffee and more coffee

flowers

celebrating beautiful weddings

playing with flowers

a fiancé who will drive all the way to LAX to pick me up late at night

(even if he is exhausted)...

...and then take me to In n Out

seeing my puppy

(insert weeping emojis here)

surprising friends late at night

angels games

face timing with friends in Florida

my job

my home

my room

my sweet roommates

my car(s)

surprises

wedding planning

getting to marry my best friend

(this total babe)

sweet text messages from my friends parents who offer to help with wedding plans

getting to marry my best friend

(i know i said that twice)

trips to home depot

dinner on the patio

that june gloom came and left quickly

sweet, life giving conversations

potting benches

McDonalds vanilla iced coffee

(if you haven't had one you are missing out)

my church

sushi

technology

evening walks with  T O N S  of gorgeous blooms

and lastly

I am so thankful for my Saviors immense and radical love for me.

I am so grateful for his abundant blessings in my life

none of which I deserve and yet he pours out his blessings

every

single 

day

what are you thankful for today???

thankful thursday: the one with a half marathon, national parks and tons and tons of tissue

happy thankful thursday friends

at least i think its thursday

to be honest i'm not sure what day it actually is

day 8

 that's what i know

i've been sick for 8 days now

and today might be the worst of them all

i can't remember the last time i was this sick

maybe college when that H1N1 flu was going around my 4th year

that was bad

at least i'm not having to wear a mask on my face

like i did then

that was embarrassing

although

 there was this really cute guy

he was sitting in the chair next to me

at the cal poly health center

he wasn't wearing a mask

if i remember correctly he was there because he hurt his foot 

or ankle or something like that

i was what you might call frumpy that day

i hadn't brushed my hair in days

i don't think i even had the energy to shower

i was achy and fighting a 103 degree fever

and my face was white

lets just say i was not at my best

the nurse brought me from the waiting room to a hallway that had a couple chairs

she told me to take a seat and wait for the doctor

the only other person waiting there was this cute guy

and my first thoughts after the nurse told me to wait...

 "seriously god"

"you're kidding me right"

"i have to sit with this guy looking like this"

"i'm wearing a freaking mask on my face"

"of all the days to sit next to a cute guy"

then i felt really sick

and defeated and i sat down

and put my head in my hands

all of the sudden

he started talking to me

which really threw me off 

considering the state i was in

i wouldn't even want to talk to me looking the way i did

he was a 5th year engineering student

and he asked me a lot of questions about me

and we both shared a little about what brought us to the health center

eventually i brought up the mask 

how i really didn't want to wear it

but that the nurse told me i had to since i had a fever

(which i had been denying i had for like 2 days)

he looked at me and very gently told me not to worry about it

he got this little smile on his face

and said i didn't need to worry about it

because it really brought out my big, beautiful blue eyes

and his smile grew a bit bigger as his head turned forward

 i definitely smiled a little under my mask

we talked a little more

i can't remember if he got up first or if i did

but i remember 

he smiled at me and told me to get better fast

he was sweet

and i never saw him again

theres like a gazillion other students at cal poly

he probably wouldn't recognize me without a mask on anyway

i was and still am thankful for that moment

that even though i felt like crap

there was this sweet guy who gave me a kind compliment

that i still remember

5 years later

a sweet little gift from the lord in a time of discomfort

honestly i have no idea how that ties into this post

but i thought of it and now i'm rolling with it

this past week

i was really sick

but it was one of the most amazing weeks i've ever had

filled with so many sweet gifts from the lord

to sum it up

last wednesday i got sick

friday i flew to salt lake city and got more sick

saturday drove to maob got even more sick

sunday ran a half marathon and cried because i was sick

sunday and monday explored canyonlands and arches national parks

and was completely blown away with what i saw

and almost forgot about how sick i was

monday drove back to salt lake city still very sick

tuesday evening flew home to la thought i was maybe getting better

wednesday went to work 

{bad decision}

today finally gave in and had to call in sick to work

and let me tell you it was totally worth it

yes

im pretty bummed i was sick for my race

that i had trained so hard for

in no way was i close to a pr

and yes i cried when i came to the end

{slightly embarrassing}

but i ran it and finished it

and saw some of the most amazing scenery i've ever seen

plus i got to watch my good friends absolutely kill their first half marathon

{proud friend right here}

i've been reminded that there are certain things

that our way out of our control

no matter how hard we try to control them

god has purpose in all things

even if i don't see it just yet

so today im not thankful im sick

{lets be real about this}

but i am thankful that despite being sick

god gave me

 precious time with friends

and that we did and saw things that i will never ever forget

i am thankful for the abundant gifts the lord gave me 

during a period of discomfort

today i am thankful for

sweet friends

life giving conversations

the ability to run

canyonlands 

arches national park

views that i will never in this lifetime forget

delicious pasta dinners

eating jam on bread 

car ride conversations

the ability to run

medicine

coffee

these two who cared for me and loved me

so well this past week

traveling and running a half marathon 

with these 4 awesome strain's

water

gatorade

my awesome running shoes

encouraging texts from friends and family

starting line smiles

{note the chapped, red nose on the left...}

the onlookers who cheered and gave high fives

somehow making it to the top of each hill

and passing people on my way up

{i know that's not nice, but i can't lie it was encouraging}

the unbelievable views on our race route

{somewhere around mile 6 before the hills began...}

completing another half marathon

running along the colorado river

chocolate milk and beer at the end of the race

burgers and fries

drives in the mountains

fall color like i've never seen before

golden aspen trees

hot tea

hot tubs

shooting stars

tissues so many tissues

cough drops

hand sanitizer

parks and rec

pizza and once upon a time

cool weather

beautiful mountains

each of the people i traveled with

and how well they handled being around a sick person

{you guys are champs}

that so far none of them have gotten sick

{hopefully that's still accurate...}

for six years of friendship with this gem

and for many many more

for adventures that i never thought i go on

for seeing things i never thought i'd see in person

for gods unbelievable and extravagant creation

answered prayers

gods grace and mercy 

and that my strength comes from him

what are you thankful for today?....

lets hear it

thankful thursday//seasons are a changin

happy thankful thursday friends

oh and happy fall

and happy october

and happy almost 1 year birthday to my baby nephew

man

where on earth is time going?...

it's hard to believe that it's fall again

{especially when its a billion degrees outside}

i really do love the changing of seasons though

it always brings hope and excitement for things to come

and there's most certainly been a lot of change

 in the past couple weeks

most notably

my brother moving out

thats right

now its officially just me and the rents

and it's a hard adjustment

i really miss him

 i miss the messages he would leave for me to find on my chalkboard

{don't be fooled it wasn't as sweet as it sounds...}

i miss our dinner dates

i miss hearing his heavy feet in the mornings

since my room is directly below his

i miss him barging into my room without knocking

just so he could sit and talk with me

i dont however miss sharing a bathroom with a boy

{we both have different interpretations of the word clean}

needless to say

i miss the guy

and all his shenanigans

 i am a proud big sister

and i can't wait to see all that god has in store for this guy 

down at UCSD

even with loads of change

there is truly so much to be thankful for

and i really believe that it's in these seasons of transition

we can see gods little touches of faithfulness and mercy the most

we see just how much we have to be thankful for

so today i am thankful 

for the changing of seasons

good health

having health insurance

the relationships i have with my siblings

the year i had at home with my brother

that my parents haven't kicked me out of the house yet

that tomorrow i get to see my niece and nephew

{there will be large quantities of snuggling}

that a year ago this month we welcomed davin into our family

visits from my sweet friend margo

thai food

text messages that couldn't have come at a more perfect time

learning about finances

having siblings who are financial advisors

making big girl decisions

dinner dates in the park

midnight flower arranging 

fresh cut flowers in my room

tri tip sandwiches from slo

wearing flowers in my hair

answered prayers

that i can have coffee every morning

that in a week i will be flying to salt lake city

the ability to run

laughing

sunset hikes to sandstone peak

with blue moons, apples and beef jerky at the top

sunsets

moonlight

friends getting married

friends who love me

ice cold chocolate milk after a long run

joy rides

encouragement

words of truth

prayer

and i am oh so thankful for god's provisions...

...for my new {to me} car

that i got at the perfect time

in the perfect place

for the perfect price

gods hands were all over this one

and i'm so thankful for my brother in law tim

who took a long lunch to come look at the car with me

then left work early for me to take the car to a mechanic that same day

i am certainly blessed with a wonderful big brother

honestly at this point my list could go on and on

so now it's your turn

what are you thankful for today?...

//Thankful Thursday//

happy thankful thursday friends

truthfully

this feels weird

sitting and writing this post

it's been an awfully long time since i've done one of these

it feels foreign

so if you're reading this

 forgive me for my jumbled and completely messy

thought process

this month is the one year anniversary

 of moving home

i know right?...

a whole year

wasn't i just moving out of my apartment?

and moving away from these precious girls?

it's odd because it really does feel like just yesterday

but at the same time 

 it feels like a distant dream

a year ago i thought that a year from then

{present day}

i would most certainly have my life figured out

well here is the honest and ugly truth

the past year has been a struggle

actually it's been a raging battle

it's been a lot harder than i ever anticipated it to be

i have never felt more alone

i have never been more uneasy about my future

i'm constantly fighting off thoughts

that i am a failure and a disappointment 

to my family 

to my self

to my god

but

in all those completely unnecessary

thoughts and emotions

holy crap batman

i'm learning so much about things i never thought i would

God is truly blowing my mind

if i were to sit here and list everything God is walking me through

we'd be here for days

heck

for weeks

for the past year all i've done is compare myself

 to those around me

my siblings

my friends

people from church

the people who come in to my work

pretty much anyone i guess

and it makes me miserable

as a girl i know comparison is something we struggle with

we do it so much

that most of the time we don't even know we are doing it

recently it has been becoming more apparent to me just how much time

and energy i waste comparing myself to others

it's ridiculous

here is what i'm currently walking through

god has created me {and you} to be unique

to be different from every other person on this planet

my story will be different than everyone around me

i will do different things

i will make different choices

and i thank god for that

how boring would it be if we all led the same lives

so this is my life

i'm unmarried

i have no children

i live with my parents

i'm starting my own business and i'm scared

i make tons and tons of mistakes every day

and i have no idea what today

tomorrow

or this next year will bring

i am a 26 year old independent woman

and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that

nothing

i'm learning to see that my life is an exciting adventure

with nothing holding me back

im learning that what's good for someone else might not be good for me

and vice versa

i wish i could say that because i've realized how much

i compare myself to others

that means i no longer do it

but it's a daily struggle and fight

{and i know i'm not alone in this}

so today i am thankful for

1 full year of living at home

that my life is unique

that YOUR life is unique

that we all have our own stories

for a job and a paycheck

getting to do flowers for weddings

spur of the moment trips

visiting slo

that this girl is getting hitched

weddings

dinner dates with my brother

lunch dates with my dad

visiting friends at work

visitors at my work

late night swims

trips to the getty

the LACMA lights

third wheeling it 

with these two crazy kids

donuts and champagne

monday night girls nights

midnight flower arranging

waking up to the sound and the smell of rain

movie nights

the people i work with

the little girl at my work who told me i was beautiful

the time spent with my small group

my new running shoes

that next month i'll be flying to utah to run a race

a dad who lets me use his car until i find a new one

gardening

coffee

post it note messages

hugs and kisses from my niece

holding my nephew

wearing flowers in my hair

 and that there is a God who is guiding and directing my life

so let's hear it

what are you thankful for today?....

Freshly Picked//Flower Crown Friday

happy friday friends

as most of you are beginning your weekend

i am heartbroken to say that mine is ending

and tomorrow begins my work week

so in order to forget about my weekend ending blues

i grabbed my clippers

wire and wire cutters

and some freshly cut blooms

my hands went to work

and this is what came about

a flower crown

naturally

fresh picks

dahlias

gomphrena

russian sage

jasmine

wax flower

dusty miller

seeded cone flower

if i could i would probably wear a flower crown every day

but that might be a bit excessive

so for now we will stick to friday's

happy flower crown friday

and have a great weekend!

DIY flower crown tutorial-straight from the garden

i don't know exactly what it is

but there is something so wonderful about wearing flowers in my hair

it brings me back to being a little girl

carefree

running around barefoot in the yard

picking flowers

making mud pies

it stirs up something in my soul

it makes me long for adventure and wonder

it's romantic

it's magical

it's beautiful

so naturally 

i love the idea of flower crowns for weddings

i can't think of a better occasion for a woman

to adorn her hair with bunches of gorgeous blooms

if i ever get married

you bet i'll be wearing flowers in my hair

forget jewelry

 i'll be accessorising with florals

but until then

i'll just be making flower crowns for others

but if you ever find yourself wanting to make a flower crown of your own

whether it's for a wedding or just for fun

i've got a little tutorial for you

it's literally easy as 1, 2, 3

and it's a bundle of fun

and you don't have to go very far to get your florals 

or even spend any money on them

just step outside into your yard

i guarantee you will have plenty to work with

be creative
and let your inner wild child run free

bringing you back to those daisy chain days

things you'll need

thin green floral wire

millinery wire 

wire cutters

flower snippers

a few of your favorite florals from the garden

florals i cut

lavender

oregano 

maidenhair fern

agapanthus

crape myrtle flowers

scabiosa

yarrow

privet leaves

step 1. 

use millinery wire. measure where you want your crown to rest on your head. connect the ends of the wire by wrapping them around each other tightly so it stays in place. you now have the base of your crown.

step 2.

 use some small greens to cover the millinery wire. i used herbs from the garden. place your greens around the crown and use your thin floral wire to attach them, wiring as you go.

step 3. 

now attach the rest of your favorite florals

by gathering them and wiring them to the crown just like you wired the greens. you can wire them individually as well as in little bunches, whichever way is easiest for you. 

i chose to do a cluster of flowers just on one side of my crown, but there are no rules. you can place flowers wherever you want on your crown.

once you're done attaching your flowers

you are finished and can enjoy

your very own floral crown.

don't be afraid to be creative

this is your flower crown

let your personality shine through your design

and have fun!