Letting Go{d}

Want the truth?

This timid and shy young woman is stubborn.

There, I said it.

I am stubborn.

I am set in my ways.

Once I have something in my head,

it stays there and it must be lived out.

Even knowing something isn't good for me,

I can't let go.

I can't let go of hopes, dreams, desires that I've had for so long...

I can't ever fully give things over to the Lord.

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It's crazy how since I have been doing work in ministry, 

I am becoming more and more aware of areas in my life that need growth.

Everything I have been trying to hide is slowly making it's way to the surface,

for everyone to see.

In the past few weeks God has been challenging me.

Challenging me to let things go.

Completely.

He is in control.

Not me.

It was a couple weeks ago that I did something I've never sincerely done before.

I prayed what some may call a very "dangerous prayer".

I prayed for change.

To be changed.

I prayed to fully let things go.

I prayed for God to do whatever He wants in my life.

 I am not finding any satisfaction in my stubbornness.

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I'm ready to move on.
I'm ready to let go.

I'm ready to put things behind me.

I'm ready for whatever adventures the Lord has waiting for me.

And I am so ready to be set in His ways,

not my own.

Thankful Thursday

 A very happy Thankful Thursday to you!

Today, I am thankful for my supporters.

I don't want to brag or anything, 

but I have the greatest team of ministry partners.

God has blessed me beyond belief with each and every one of you.

I spent months praying that the Lord would build up a team to join me in this journey.

Once again God delivered.

Each and every one of you are so unique,

and play such a specific role in this ministry. 

You each are a very special answer to my prayers.

Thank you.

Thank you for your prayer and support.

Thank you for stepping out in faith.

Thank you for coming along side me.

Because of your trust in God, 

students are hearing the Gospel and coming to know Christ personally.

 To the supporter's I've known a while,

to the supporters I've met a few times,

and to the supporters I still have yet to meet.....

I want you to know that it is not just today, 

but EVERYDAY that I am thankful for you. 

You bring me so much joy.

This video is for you!

Campus Crusade for Christ -- Christmas Thank You from Masterworks on Vimeo.

Thankful Thursday

Happy Thankful Thursday to you!

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I missed last Thursday.

My bad.

It was kind of a crazy week.

Today, I am thankful for prayer.

More specifically, How the Lord works through prayer.

God's been showing me recently through very specific instances,

that my prayer life needs some serious help.

God desires to know our hearts.

And He is teaching me how to truly share my heart with Him.
All of it, including those parts I try so desperately to ignore.

I'm learning to pray BOLDLY.
I'm learning to ask God for specific things.
And I am learning that God truly answers.
If you ask God to change you and challenge you.
He will.
Oh goodness, He will!

I am thankful that we serve a God who desires to hear from us.
Who desires to know our deepest desires and our struggles.

I am thankful that the Lord is giving my prayer life a makeover.
I am thankful that He is showing me new things about who I am in Him.
I am thankful that He is challenging me and refining me.
I am thankful that prayer is powerful.

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“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened".

{Luke 11:9-10}

What are you thankful for today?

Friend Spotlight: The Floridian

Meet Margo.

She is one of my (new) roommates.
She is beautiful, tenderhearted, passionate and a HUGE blessing in my life.

Margo and I actually met on skype,
back in May when she was living in Paris.

I kept getting emails and Facebook messages
from mutual friends that we were learning we had in common.
Suggesting that I pursue her as a roommate.
Telling me we have similar interests,
that we would really mesh well together.
It was after just one time of skyping
we decided to do it, to be roommates.

She is originally from Florida (the land of Tim Tebow)
and this is her first time even being in California.
Her and I both work as interns for Cru.
She works in the PSW Regional Office and I work on campus.

It has been so fun to get to know her over these past couple months.
To see how the Lord is growing our friendship.
How He has broken down walls and
allowed for openness and vulnerability to enter in.
How we are learning to pursue each other.
How to love one another.
It is through Margo,
that the Lord is really teaching me the value of pursuing relationships.

Our mutual friends were right.
We do in fact have a lot in common.
We have very similar personalities, life experiences and passions.
Yesterday we got to spend some time meandering through some Live Oak forests.
It was cold, but absolutely beautiful!

There was talk about life.
God.
Growth.
Family.
Plants.
The Future.
And yes, of course there was some intermittent talk about guys.

I love that Margo and I share the same adventurous spirit
and the same passion for the Lords magnificent creation.

The fall colors were brilliant.

The red Pyracantha berries brought us some Christmas spirit! 

There were moss covered rocks.

And walls of ferns!

I wasn't the only one taking snapshots of ferns...

(I'm teaching her well).

We also made some friends with a group of deer!

It's so exciting to be able to share moments like these with my roommate.

Moments where it's just us and the Lord.

Moments where we can grow together.

Margo, I am so thankful the Lord has brought you here.

That He has us walking together through this season of life.

I am blessed by you.

Know that you are treasured.

Thankful Thursday

Happy Thankful Thursday to you!
I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Today, I am thankful for good books.

I find it strange that this is something I'm actually thankful for.

I am not someone who typically likes to pick up a book and just read it.

I always thought I hated to read.

This is how it normally goes...

Someone I know tells me I need to read a certain book.

 "Rachel you have to read this, it's a total Rae book."

I shrug my shoulders and brush it off. 

Whatever, I don't like reading.

Typically it's multiple people,
over a period of time that try to get me to read something.

And eventually I give in and read whatever it is.

 Every time, I end up loving it.

Most recently it was "The Hunger Games".

People have been telling me to read this for a while now.

I NEVER wanted to.

Who wants to spend time reading about kids being forced to kill each other?

Um, how morbid and upsetting is that?!

Oh but, it's not at all what I thought it to be...

I'm really not sure how it happened, but I finally gave in.

And of course I loved it.

I read it in less than 24 hours.

And I'm the world's slowest reader,

so obviously I liked  loved it.

Time for book #2!

I really enjoy these types of books.

Books with stories I can see clearly in my mind,
I love getting to use my imagination.

Books with characters that I can relate to in some way.

Books with adventure, that leave me itching to know what's next.

Books that get me excited.

And of course books with some sort of romantic tension....

Yes, The Hunger Games had it all.

A little side note-

 The main character was very well versed in the plant world...

I was sold pretty quickly on that one.

Naturally.

So, I am thankful for good books.

Books that make me want to pick up more books and read.
I'm also very thankful for the people who talk me into reading them all!

Maybe I've actually been a reader all along.....